so i'm figuring out why i'm more prone to wallow in frustration when i'm alone at night than keep myself perky and upbeat.
it's because it's easier to imagine it.
it's easier to imagine being left out.
it's easier to imagine being broken hearted.
it's easier to imagine being unrecognized.
it's easier to imagine being adrift when you're alone with your thoughts.
psychology tells us that our negative experiences stick with us more than our positive ones - that all the high fives we get from someone might be threatened by the one angry glance. sometimes all it takes is a kick to the emotional foundation for us to question the entire navigation we've built for ourselves.
somehow, just that realization makes it much easier for me to tell those voices to chill out. if you'll excuse me, i'm going to go crank up some Toadies and dance around the room. even if no one else is here, and i'm just biding my time until i get to move back downtown, and i'm bored and feeling a little sorry for myself that life right now is a waiting game...
there's no reason to be lonely. it's a good, quiet night.